I came to an important realization while cleaning the kitchen: Men shouldn't be in charge of things. Even mine, who is a lovely fella. He's kind and handsome; he's the last of the real romantics; and he's got that sense humor we all say we want, specifically one on the dry absurdist side, which is probably why he seems to be crazy about me. And here's the bit that will make you giddy, girls: he cleans.
Well, he cleans some things, when I ask, or when it falls into the small category of Dirt Which Is Visible To Him. This means mostly he does the dishes.
But here's the thing: He washes the dishes, he stacks them in the drainboard until they threaten to topple. He usually drains the sink. He may take a swipe around with the dishrag. And then he's done. The floor, the counter, the stove, the stacks of stuff on the various surfaces, the unidentified objects getting limp in the crisper -- these are all part of the vast body of Dirt Visible Only To Me.
He does laundry, too. Puts it in the washer, puts it in the dryer, dries it until crispy, stuffs it in a basket, and sets it on the living room floor.
Then he flies out to an aircraft carrier, hangs up a Mission Accomplished banner, and waits for the applause.
Yes, thank you, sweetie. It's great to have your help. But it's time for me to scrub the kitchen floor. I think the cat is stuck to it.
Hey Erin sounds like what Pat would say about my not seeing dirt and about me getting water and oil all over. There seems to be a lot of dirt around this house only she sees - like watermarks on the bathroom door, foggy/misty marks on the bathroom mirror and yes a dirty kitchen floor always seems to not be noticed by me. So I'm a messy cook what can I say? Besides I really don't notice these things.
I'm afraid it really is hard-wired. I think it goes back to our remote australopithecine ancestors, when the women had to be more careful about dirt in order to keep the young ones healthy--survival instinct.
Hey....SOME of us have been well trained by mom's obsessed with cleanliness...I scrub, mop, clean baseboards, vaccum, and even do windows! Hard wiring CAN be overcome. But it may take 20 years... ;-)
You have to start training early. My husband sees dirt I don't see, or can live with. He vaccuums more than I would. But I do find myself cleaning kitchen counters more than him. He will, however, clean out the burners and stuff.
I don't know if you remember/know, Erin, but back in college, there was this one time Tom came over and "wanted to help", I think you were sick or something. He cleaned the whole kitchen and took apart the burners and cleaned off all the gunk. It was amazing - from a guy.
Well, in my defence, I usually hang up the clothes. It's usually the last basket of laundry that ends up staying in the last basket.
And, Erin, we should talk about your propensity of leaving the food out once you're done cooking with it. :-)
As a man and as a long distance friend I can only say, well, nothing because I think it safest.
thrive!,
O
P.S. you seriously need to get code in the saltandlight fixed, it points to a page that no longer exists -- as the new ring owner, I know :)
P.S. I should add that the ring code is perfect on the main entry page but stale as a Dunkin Donut on the comments pages :)
I thought men knew it was their duty to store the food they risked their lives to get out in the savannah. At least that's what my husband does. I could say something sexist about him having better spatial ability to fit it in tupperware and the fridge, but we both can do that, I just feel my work is done at the end of eating the meal (whether or not I cooked it).
I hate to comment on this, but I haven't commented on your site lately and I AIN'T gonna comment on that other - thing. About your cornflower, your doppleganger, your whatzit, your love pump, your...
Nevertheless,
these two posts could be compared and contrasted, and held up as proof of the wisdom of specialization of labo(u)r.
My, my. How to elicit the maximum number of comments . . .
I mostly did this piece to get to the "Mission Accomplished" line.
The "Mission Accomplished" photo-op puzzled me even at the time. I thought: "this is gonna look terrible in another few months. Why are they doing this? Don't they know?" In cleaning the kitchen floor it occured to me: "No, they didn't know. It didn't fall into the category of Military Planning Visible to Neocons." Just because it's perfectly visible to the rest of us, doesn't mean the boys can see it.
I guess I'll have to respin this piece if it's gonna work as a domestic/political satire. Forgive me. I'm new to them.